Some Illinoisans were eager to grab a bite indoors or return to their gym over the weekend, as the state moved into the next phase of the governor's reopening plan. Others chose to stay home.
Tricia Larson, director of behavioral health outpatient for UnityPoint Health-UnityPlace, said neither choice is right or wrong.
“Many individuals are in a different place with their comfort level right now,” she said. “Everybody has their own thoughts and feelings about what they think is safe and appropriate at this time. I really want to emphasize—for everyone’s mental health—that that’s okay.”
Larson said most people are going to have family or friends in their lives who disagree. She said the most important thing is to set healthy boundaries and feel empowered to say "no."
“If it’s related to an invitation to something—for example, a party or a social gathering—they could share that they appreciate that invitation and discuss that they have an inability to attend at this time,” she said. “The closeness of the relationship and the type of relationship would help to guide how much the person chose to share.”
Larson said to be open-minded and respectful of the full spectrum of decisions others are making, even if you find their behavior concerning—for example, if a loved one refuses to wear a face covering.
“We can all utilize the factual information that we have and try to help educate others, and express the reasons we feel something might be important,” she said. “In the end, everyone does have to make their own decisions.”
Another feeling people are experiencing during the pandemic is guilt, Larson said.
“All of us are witnessing the loss and devastation that’s occurring across the globe and that can certainly surface complicated feelings—especially if your own life has largely remained intact, with health, with family, if you haven’t experienced a lot of changes with employment,” she said.
Larson said some may be experiencing so-called survivor’s guilt, if they’ve lived through something traumatic or life-threatening when others haven’t been as lucky. Others are experiencing normalcy guilt because their day-to-day life hasn’t changed much.
Larson said those feelings may worsen as Illinois advances in its reopening plan and people return to their old routines.
“Participating in these activities can surface another layer of guilt—and really create a paradox,” she said. “Some communities are able to move forward as we’re seeing others are raving in the midst of devastation.”
Dealing with guilt is a lot like addressing stress or anxiety, Larson said. Eating well, taking time for exercise, getting enough rest, and openly communicating one’s feelings can go a long way, she said. But there also are constructive ways to use those feelings.
“When you’re experiencing guilt, something that may assist is to do something where you feel like you’re helping someone else,” she said.
Most importantly, Larson said, it’s important to acknowledge feelings of guilt or anxiety and accept that they’re okay.
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