BILL KURTIS: From NPR and WBEZ Chicago, this is WAIT WAIT... DON'T TELL ME, the NPR news quiz. I'm Bill Kurtis. We're playing this week with Petey Deabreu, Faith Salie and Adam Felber. And here again is your host...
(APPLAUSE)
KURTIS: ...At the Chase Bank Auditorium in downtown Chicago, Peter Sagal.
PETER SAGAL, HOST:
Thank you, Bill. In just a minute, if you're lost and you look, you will find Bill rhyme after rhyme.
FAITH SALIE: (Laughter).
SAGAL: It's the Listener Limerick Challenge. If you'd like to play, give us a call at 1-888-WAIT-WAIT. That's 1-888-924-8924. Right now, panel, some more questions for you from the week's news.
Faith, this week a reporter spent four days and countless resources getting to the bottom of a mystery that attracted feverish media attention from across the country, how a mysterious what ended up in New York City.
SALIE: Is this an animal?
SAGAL: It is not an animal...
SALIE: Oh, it's not.
SAGAL: ...Although, sometimes, it comes animal style.
SALIE: Oh...
PETEY DEABREU: That's a good hint.
SALIE: ...An In-N-Out burger.
SAGAL: Yes, an In-N-Out burger.
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SALIE: What?
SAGAL: A pristine, uneaten, perfectly wrapped In-N-Out burger was found in the middle of a street in Queens on Monday.
(LAUGHTER)
SALIE: What?
SAGAL: Now, that is thousands of miles away from the nearest In-N-Out Burger restaurant.
SALIE: It's global warming. It's migration, I'm telling you.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: It's possible. Social media became obsessed. Had New York found a strange and inconvenient way to patch potholes? Was there a portal to a parallel, superior dimension in which In-N-Out was available everywhere? And how did it survive more than three minutes without being eaten? I mean, that's a pretty good burger. Who cares if it's street meat?
SALIE: What did we discover?
SAGAL: Well, NYPD put out an Amber-ger Alert.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Anyway, an investigative reporter spent four days on the problem. And she was able to track down this 16-year-old Queens resident who had picked up three In-N-Out burgers on her trip to San Diego. People love them so much they fly to California. They get burgers. They bring them home. Somehow she kept him in pristine condition the whole way back, didn't eat them. But when she got home, she was rushing to catch a bus. The bag burst open. And one of them fell to the ground.
SALIE: Did a burglar steal it?
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Like a Hamburglar? No. We think what happened was, like a lot of people or things that come to New York, it thought it could finally be a star, so it ran away and will be appearing with Andy Cohen next Monday night on Watch What We Found On The Street Live.
Adam, online dating may actually now become a thing of the past because there's a new kind of matchmaking where you try to get a date by simply asking your friends to do what for you?
ADAM FELBER: Find you a date.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Yes, but using what technique?
FELBER: On their dating apps.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: It's like putting your profile, like, and by the way, I have a friend. No.
FELBER: Yeah, yeah.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: No, not at all. I'll give you a hint.
FELBER: Yeah.
SAGAL: Here on slide 3, you can see that...
FELBER: PowerPoint.
SAGAL: Yes, PowerPoint.
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FELBER: I read something about that.
SAGAL: Yes, it's this thing where you ask your friends to create a PowerPoint slide deck all about you.
SALIE: Oh.
FELBER: That's great.
SAGAL: Helping you move used to be the worst thing you could ask a friend to do. No more.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: It's a new dating trend. It gives you the opportunity to say the sentence, hey, can you whip up a PowerPoint to help me get lucky? The event is called DateMyFriend.ppt.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: Oh, the office drones know that. And it gives your friends a chance to pitch you to other singles at this big presentation using PowerPoint.
FELBER: Wow.
SAGAL: It combines all the fun of a work meeting with the people who know all your worst secrets.
(LAUGHTER)
SALIE: And if your friend's name is Ted, you can say, thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.
SAGAL: Exactly right.
(LAUGHTER)
SALIE: Wait, so - woah, OK. So do people - is it an event?
SAGAL: Yes.
SALIE: And - OK.
SAGAL: The idea is you go to this event. Either you're a seller or a buyer. It's sort of exactly like any other kind of business presentation - right? - like an investment thing or a sales pitch. You come in. You're a buyer. You sit down, and the sellers come up and say, and now let me introduce you to my friend, Ted. And they show you a PowerPoint, including - and this was a real one - such positive points - you know, it's, of course, it'll be a little bullet-pointed list with a star wipe - you know? - has in-unit washer and dryer.
(LAUGHTER)
SALIE: Are there cons listed, too? You want to feel like you're getting the whole package, you know?
SAGAL: It's sales. That's not - if you're in sales...
FELBER: See, I'd rather see it as a commercial.
SAGAL: ...You don't tell people it's a bad product.
SALIE: I'd rather get it up front. Yeah, I mean, this is...
FELBER: Produce a commercial.
DEABREU: Yeah, it's like, is this a fix-me-up, or can I move in? What's going on?
SAGAL: Yeah.
DEABREU: Don't sell me a lemon. They're going to try to sell you a lemon.
SAGAL: That's terrible if someone's, like, pitching you a potential date as, like, a real rehab opportunity.
(LAUGHTER)
SAGAL: That's not good. All Mary needs is some tender, loving care and some antabuse, and she'll be fine.
FELBER: This one's a tear-down but at a great price.
SAGAL: Exactly.
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